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From under the benches at Juicy-Fruit

THE REAL STORY by Jastro

Turning over the Line-Up May 23, 2008

Last night the ‘Stros turned the line-= up over four times and had three outs remaining as they started the bottom of = the ninth with a two-run deficit.  You d= o not want Bourn to be that first batter to go to the plate for the fifth time, period.  Sure, Bourn might hit= one off of Utley’s glove for an error (ruled hit in the first inning last night, and if Utley’s glove didn’t touch the ball it sure should have—Utley would agree he should make that play), but more likely Bou= rn will be retired at the plate.

The ‘Stros fought hard to keep in the = game last night only to begin their final at-bats with Bourn leading off.  If you bel= ieve that Bourn’s glove and speed are valuable, as Jastro does, then perha= ps Bourn should work on his batting while not collecting one of the precious f= ew at-bats when your team turns over the lineup four times.<= /h2>

Batting Bourn in the fourth thru seventh spo= ts in the order are not worth discussing, leaving the eighth and ninth spots as options for on-the-job training for Bourn.=   Jastro favors the latter, ninth spot, traditionally reserved for the pitcher.  Jastro says that aft= er the second inning it seems like the team would be turning the line-up over fast= er, with Bourn batting after the pitcher’s spot.  The potential that the pitcherR= 17;s spot would be walked to pitch to Bourn is the same, but it may appear to ha= ppen faster.  Bourn would always be hitting behind the pitcher’s spot and not before, don’t you see? 

All-Star Ballot Stuffing May 21, 2008

Baseball, like life, is a game of adjustments.  “Click it = or ticket” is a great example of adjusting for local law-enforcement.  Energy prices have strained the bu= dgets of many a city-state as speeding tickets plummet.

The ‘Stros really don’t have an All-Star caliber candidate at third base this year.  At first base, we have a dinger in Berkman and there are a couple of other candidates in the league.  The All-Star second baseman is not= a “Stro”, though Matsui is doing great for us.  Behind the plate, the ‘Stros= are without an All-Star candidate. 

Tejada is a great candidate at shortstop and= a couple of other good candidates exist in the league. 

This year, this ‘Stros’ outfield= ers are not All-Star candidates in good conscience.  The ‘Stros have two All-Star candidates based on the 2008 season performances to date; Berky and Tejada.=

So if you believe, like Jastro, that your te= am has an opportunity to win the NL pennant, you should vote for the best poss= ible NL All-Star team for the best shot at hosting the home-field advantage in t= he World Series and not a straight ‘Stros ticket like we did in the old days.

First Quarter of First Half Report:  2008 Astros’ Campaign a Mode= l for Baseball Diversity April 23, 2008

They have youth and experience, speed and po= wer, pitching and fielding, and hitting and base running; what more could an Ast= ro fan ask for?  Well, a winning record, a lead in the central division and legitimate C= y Young, MVP and ROY candidates.  Fact is the Astros have chances for all of that, and a skipper of the year possibility.

After 21 games in 2008, the ‘Stros have the same record (9-12) as they had in 2007; with one huge difference:  the 2008 team is riding a three-ga= me win-streak, whereas the 2007 bunch had just lost their sixth game in a row!  It has taken the new and improved Astros this 21-game period to get acquainted with each other and, unfortunately for the rest of baseball and great for ‘Stros fans, the honeymoon appears to be over!

The two game series just completed with the Padres set team highs in hits and scoring in the first game, only to be bro= ken against one of the best pitchers in baseball last night.  Sure, it is early in the 2008 seas= on—there is still hockey and basketball going on—and there are 141 games left = on the schedule, but Jastro is very optimistic about where this team is headin= g.

The biggest surprises thus far are the outstanding fielding and less than expected hitting; with some concerns in = the pitching department.  This ser= ies sweep of the Padres certainly showed a strong desire to win and the wins we= re of total team efforts.  Yes, T= ejada had a tremendous series, at the plate and in the field, but huge contributi= ons were made by most of the 25-man roster.

Jastro is marking May 16th—= after 20 more games and seven more series’ and before the start of interlea= gue play—as the date for the real first-quarter report and expects the As= tros will be no worse than 21-20 at that point.

Hope Coop & Co. aren’t Riding Valverde-Train to Play-Offs April 18, 2008

OK, the 6-11 ‘Stros are whittling away= at .500 baseball; the not-so-lofty goals of skippers’ past.  Meanwhile in the NL Central, a cou= ple of teams are hoping their divisional foes strive for .500 baseballs, so to put those teams out of contention.  The next-to-last thing Jastro wants to see is 50-50 baseball when opponents str= ive for more.  The last thing, of course, is achieving 50-50 baseball in a very winnable division.  While the ‘Stros defense has= not been a hindrance thus far, Jastro knows that a great offense wins the central.  Have Coop & Co. checked the lumber, uniform or image companies?=   How about the publicists, spin-doc= s and ESPN?

Great pitching performances, excellent defen= sive performances and mighty tales of lumber fall silent to the voices of baseba= ll concerning Jastro’s Astros thus far this season.  For very good reason—the team sucks as a team.  Jastro knows= that suckage starts at the top, and he knows Drayton don’t take much suckage—unless Biggio or Bagwell are involved.  Minus those two anchors, ‘St= ros fans surely know that the old man ain’t going to wait for a healthy Matsui to save the season; right?

Jastro and Harry at Wrigley April 5, 2008

It is always a challenge to interpret Jastro’s babble after an afternoon game at Wrigley because Jastro inevitably hoists more than a few Buds in honor of his chum, Harry Carey.  Jastro can’t be quoted on a “PG-14—ludicrousy” website, but the gist of Jastro’s report was somewhat as follows.

Jastro, in the bottom of the sixth inning:  “Harry-old-chum, your Cubbies might be worth more fielding blunders than my ‘Stros this year.  Coop should notice that Oswalt has recorded all of ZERO strikeouts in six full innings of work, fooling nary a= Cubbie, and pinch-hit when Roy is due to hit second in the seventh.”

 

Harry:  “Jack-Astro, Roy is winning for a change this season= , let him hit.  Besides, I would play Carlos at first, Berkman in left, and Derrick could play left, Soriano could play third and Manny could play first.”

 

Harry, in the bottom of the eighth with a dab of mustard on his chin and his specs still fogged up after a deep belch:  “Did you see that sparrow fly out of the ivy in right-right-ce= nter when Bourn was shading a step too far to the left and = DeeRossa hit that 2-run double off of Gary?”

 

Jastro:  “Hiccup-nope, but if Coop was going to let Oswalt pitch the eighth, he should have let Roy finish the damned inning.  At least Coop hasn’t burned = his last catcher and Sampson could play short if Tejada has withdrawals and Bac= ke can play left for a defensive move if we can come back into this game—what-da-ya-think, Harry?

 

Harry:  “I think Ron Santos’ rendition of ‘Take me out at the ballgame’ sounded a lot like M= ike Ditka.  I hear what you say, m= aybe if Coop wants to be Phil Garner he should use lots more sunscreen; because = his batting average is too high.  = Are you buying this round?”

Astros get Tails-Taped:  San Diego Series Review April 4, 2008

Even though the Padres spotted the Astros ni= ne more outs in the series, the Astros sent three less batters to the plate (148-151).  Both teams slugged= 13 extra-base hits with four homers.  The Astros hit nine doubles to the Padres’ eight, but the Padr= es added a triple.  The Astros hi= t 14 singles to the Padres’ 33 and the Astros walked two more times than t= he Padres (14-12) and had one batter reach on an error.  Both teams had one baserunner remo= ved attempting to advance an extra base in poor decisions and the Padres left n= ine more runners on base (37-28).  The Astros turned five double plays to the Padres’ one and were six for s= ix in the stolen base department verses the Padres’ one for one.  Berkman’s steal of third bas= e in game three was the only benefit a stolen base provided either team in the series.  The Padres won the se= ries 3-1 by outscoring the Astros 15-12, but the wins are what matter.

 

Jastro is disappointed that the Padres were able to pound out 19 more singles in t= he series, but he is not overly concerned about the offense, except for the starting pitching.  Astros pit= chers were hitless in eight plate appearances with one walk and no RBI or runs scored.  Conversely, the Padres’ starters had two hits in nine appearances with a sacrifice-fly and 2 RBI—including a game-winner.

 

Furthermore, the 7-9 batters in both line-ups had 45 appearances at the plate, but the Astros were out-hit 14-5 and outscored 5-2; basically the difference in the series.  That sounds all too familiar.

 

Give it up for the PUMA, Jastro’s player of the series for the Astros.  Lance went to the plate 18 times, reached base six times, scored three times, knocked in three and stole two bases.  He had only four hits,= but they were all extra-base hits with three doubles and that game-winning ding= er in game three of the series.  = While you are at it, give it up for El Caballo—Jastro’s goat of the series.  Lee appeared at the p= late 17 times, driving in only himself on his solo homer in game three while lea= ving nine comrades on base in the series.  Lee was almost thrown out at second as he admired his no-doubt double,  recorded a single on a botched pop-up to shallow left and barely got to first on a ball thrown abo= ut four feet out of the first-baseman’s reach on a grounder to third.  Sorry Carlos, but Jastro said he won’t even mention your defense in this series.=

 

The Padres come to JuicyFruit for two games on the 21st and 22n= d of April to complete the season series between these clubs.  Hopefully we get a rematch of Oswalt/Peavy.  Either way, the Astros need to win both games.

Don’t Count Woody Out March 23, 2008

According to the sports-scribes’ interpretations of recent Coop-comments, Shawn Chacon is a lock for a rotat= ion spot and Woody is fighting with Sampson, Cassel and Moehler for the fifth starter position.  Chacon is scheduled to start again tomorrow against the Marlins and should pitch his final spring start against the Tigers at Minute-Maid next Saturday.&n= bsp; Sampson pitches Tuesday night in Lakeland against the Tigers.  Wandy pit= ched two innings in the minor-league camp today and will probably start another minor-league game next week, unless Coop decides to start him against Detro= it in Houston next weekend—especially if Chacon bombs against the Marlins tomorrow, which Jastro thinks is quite possible.  Jastro is certain that the Tigers = will bury Chacon if they get a shot at him this spring.

Coop & Co. must decide who the fifth sta= rter will be, but that decision affects roughly 20% of the games in the schedule.  Far more reaching a= re the decision surrounding the Astros’ batting order.  Hunter Pence must bat in the top t= hird of the batting order for the Astros to optimize offensive production.  At this writing, Michael BournR= 17;s 17 whiffs in 60 official at-bats hardly justify batting in the lead-off spot.  Many of these whiffs ha= ve come on three pitches.  Today, against the lefty Hampton, Bourn struck out on the third pitch with a home-run swing to start the game.  If Coop & Co. bows = to pressure from the Pony to hit in the fourth spot, consideration must be giv= en to starting either Cruz or Erstad instead of Bourn in the outfield—wow!  Should the Astros have pitching woes, this problem will be magnified.

Coop is Good March 23, 2008

According to the sports-scribes’ interpretations of recent Coop-comments, Shawn Chacon is a lock for a rotat= ion spot and Woody is fighting with Sampson, Cassel and Moehler for the fifth starter position.  Chacon is scheduled to start again tomorrow against the Marlins and should pitch his final spring start against= the Tigers at Minute-Maid next Saturday.&n= bsp; Sampson pitches Tuesday night in Lakeland against the Tigers.  WoodyR= 17;s next start should be Friday against those Tigers in <= st1:place w:st=3D"on">Houston.  There is no “lock” for the fourth spot in the AstrosR= 17; rotation.  Woody, Chacon and S= ampson are battling for two rotation spots--period.

Jastro will have much more to say about the Astros’ pitching after the game today, so Happy Easter and please che= ck back!

Cuts, Round Two March 16, 2008

The Outfield:  Since the Astros are good with Lee, Pence, Bourn, Erstad and Cruz on= the opening-day roster, Jastro keeps Abercrombie for road games—or games = El Caballo might want to sit out—to show-off.  Abercrombie may or may not take a = AAA offer that Coop & Co. may or may want to make in a couple of weeks.  Good-bye Victor Diaz and Nick Gorn= eault, for now.

The Infield:  Berkman, Matsui, Tejada, Wigginton, Blum and Loretta will make the opening-day roster.  Since Mat= sui will not be in camp, both Blum and Loretta can get plenty of work; and, may= be we can see Q play some third base.  Thomas Perez and David Newhan are a tough pair to pick from and both should play everyday:  Good-by= e.

The Catchers:  Towles and Ausmus are locks.  Q looks sharp at the plate, behind the plate and at the tailors—with his new frame.  Jastro likes the idea, during the s= pring as we evaluate pitching, of having Ausmus, Towles or Q play first base on occasion.  This practice allow= s the catchers to watch the pitchers in a different light in a game-situation.  To that end, Jastro may keep anoth= er receiver for a couple of weeks, Alberto Castillo—a veteran with nowhe= re to go.  Good-bye Joshua Johnso= n and J.R. House.

The Pitchers:  After last the cuts last week, 22 pitchers remained in camp.  Felipe Paulino has been removed du= e to injury.  Some others have remo= ved themselves from this competition with only a few innings left to go around, leaving 15 pitchers in camp.  Good-bye Mike DeJean, Runelvys Hernandez, Jack Cassel, Stephen Rando= lph (changed from Geary after the Dodgers game), Ryan Houston and Chad Paronto.  If the ‘Stros = had either the Yanks or Rays on their remaining spring schedule, Jastro would h= ave kept Paronto a little longer—the man should play on the Texans’ line!

On Another Note:  Only Bud Selig would bring the game to China and end the first game = with a 3-3 tie!

 

 

Woody Williams Roughed-Up March 12, 2008

Everybody has seen the box-score and Woody w= ill be highlighted on S= portsCenter in the morning.  No doubt the Houston Chronicle posted an= R.I.P. column in the morning paper for poor Woody.  Jastro said that when Woody walked= into the dugout after pitching his third and final inning, Coop said simply, “You’re done”.  Woody replied sternly, “Bull-shit, I’m going to whoop ‘em”!   Coop = said more sternly, “You are whooped, and the media will love it; go shower”.  Woody refused = to leave and said, “I hope we don’t fly SouthWest”.

If you recall, Roy didn’t come away unscathed wh= en he faced half of this Tigers’ line-up last Tuesday, giving = up a homer to Pudge Rodriguez as well.  Before we tighten the noose on Woody, we should look at how the other Astro pitchers fare against this Tigers’ line-up:  Friday night in Kissimmee and the two games in Houston to end the spring.  We canR= 17;t forget that Woody is guaranteed $6.3 million this year.

Woody would have pitched five innings today.  Jastro thinks he will = find both Woody and Rogers playing pool from their HummerRounds for the bar-tab.  Woo= dy will pitch to any line-up, anytime, and go seven innings.  Jastro wonders if he wasn’t working on humility today.  Fo= lks, this team is better with Woody, who also brings a stick to most of his games and will accept mop-up or blow-out duties.

Dave Raymond and Brent (or Brett) Nolan, covering today’s action on AM 790 The Sports Animal, were not very kind to Woody, either.  Detroit hit four homers today, and has 26 in the early spring.  They have only scored 93-runs, 7 m= ore than the Astros.  Nobody wants= to pitch to the Tigers’ line-up, except Woody.

Woody and Rogers combine to be older than LaSorda, and both will probably walk on a major-league field when they are 80!.   Jastro knows that = if he finds those veteran pitchers, Brandon, Roy, Wandy and Sampson will be cover= ing Woody’s Backe.

 

Meeting Jastro March 10, 2008

I smelled the Budweiser way before he walked in.  Jastro said I “sucked” at play-by-play,   Jastro not only read me the riot-act; he faulted me for what he called, “starving his ass”.  He said, “No raise, no kudos, nor no praise: just $end $ome = $oon kind of crap.&nb= sp; JASTRO loves the team, I love the team:  Please give me a week, Jastro̷= 0;.

The First-Round Cuts March 10, 2008

Jastro is quite pleased with the first-round cuts issued by Coop and Co., further fueling his optimism for the season.  Astro fans probably already read L= isa Gray’s column, but if you don‘t, you should check it out here.  Lisa loves baseball and the ‘Stros, and she is a style of her own.  Her column is another go= od place for Astro fans to read.  More informed opinions, too!

 

Laughing at Jastro March 9, 2008

You might laugh at this more than the regula= rs at the C & L Sports Bar and Grill in Portland, Oregon did last season w= hen Jastro, dressed in Astros, walked in the joint to catch the ‘Stros on satellite during a Mariners game; when Jastro tells you this:  Wandy Rodriguez is going to compet= e with Roy, and win, the National League Cy Young award this season.

This after losing $20 at the R & R Sports Bar in Katy, Tx. for several years in the early= 2000s on a bet that the ‘Stros would hit back-to-back-to-back-to-back homers during the regular season.  Fo= lks, we will see that in 2008!  Thi= s team is FOR REAL.  JastroDamus or Jack-astroDumb-ass, you be the judge.  As JastroMama has said, “Never lie to your Dr. or lawyer; don’t discuss sex, religion or money: and always call a spade a spade”:  Not necessarily= at one time, or in that order.

Trimming the Excess Players, 53-13 leave 40 March 9, = 2008

Cooper and Company learned a bunch this week= end, and should be ready to make the first round of cuts as early as tonight.  Houston readers probably watched the Nats beat the Astros yesterday on FSN.  If so, you saw that everyone had a= good eye at the plate except home plate umpire Lance Barksdale.  Righty Felipe Paulino walked 4, Va= lverde walked 2, McLemore walked 3 and Gervacio walked 1.  Brocail and DeJean did not walk ba= tters, but Brocail was tattooed for 3 runs on 4 hits, including 2 doubles.

Minor league teams will start playing games = next week and it is tough to get innings in for the 28 pitchers (22 roster pitch= ers) in camp, so the first round of trimmings will come soon for the Astros.  There is still a split-squad game = on the schedule next Saturday, but there are plenty of players to fill gaps in the line up in Florida this time of the year.  Jastro thinks that Cooper has done an exceptional job running his first spring training camp as a major league skipper thus far, but it is decision time.<= o:p>

Jack Cassel was named ‘star of the game’ today by the guys in the radio booth.  Jastro watched the game today (via= the New York CW11 on MLB.TV) and thought that Cassel was throwing off-speed and curve balls at all edges of the plate.&nbs= p; His control and location were good, but when he had to throw strikes with his fastball he was very hittable.&nb= sp; The righty, acquired via free-agency was signed in December and shou= ld remain on the 40-man roster, but as a starter in Round Rock (we have Wandy,= a lefty).  The hard-throwing rig= hty Runelvys Hernandez (a non-roster invitee) just can’t seem to gain con= trol of his pitches and will turn 28 this August, sorry Hernandez.

Lefties Stephen Randolph, Mark McLemore, and Josh Muecke have been lousy this spring, leaving the young lefty Wesley Wri= ght with an opportunity to land a bullpen spot.  These are the only lefties in camp= vying for reliever spots, so Ed Wade will be watching the waiver wire closely over the next couple of weeks.  Dump Randolph, work with Muecke in Round Rock and give Wright and McLemore a cou= ple of more innings in camp.

Tommy Manzella is a slick shortstop that sho= uld play everyday in Round Rock, along with David Newhan; both should see actio= n at the major-league level this year (Manzella almost assuredly).  Good-byes to Lance Niekro and Thom= as Perez, setting the 25-man roster with 6 infielders:  Berkman, Matsui, Tejada, Wigginton= , Blum and Loretta.  Catchers Joshua Johnson and J. R. House can go down to the minors and Alberto Castillo can support Ausmus, Towles and Quintero until the Astros break camp.=

Yordany Ramirez should continue his developm= ent playing everyday in Round Rock.  The Astros have no use for Nick Gorneault and Victor Diaz in camp this spring anymore, leaving Cruz and Abercrombie looking for an outfield spot.  Now we wait for the official announcements….

Bourn Ultimatum March 7, 2008

Jastro thinks that a huge factor in the succ= ess or failure of the 2008 season relies on the effectiveness of Michael Bourn = as the lead-off batter.  His 2-3 = with 2-doubles, 2-runs scored, a strikeout, and a sacrifice bunt for today may appear to be okay stats.  If y= ou watched the game, you would know that he would have gone 0-3 in major-league action.  Both doubles were wind-blown fly balls that still didn’t make the warning track, and bo= th would be outs in the regular season.  He whiffed on three pitches (the first two were called strikes) and = was bunting for a hit for his sacrifice in the third inning.  In 29 plate appearances he has str= uck out 6 times, walked 4 times, scored 4 times and has 2 steals out of 4 attempts.  If you take away th= e doubles today that will be routine fly outs when games count, his .429 OBP becomes a .360 and his .333 BA becomes a .250. 

The ‘Stros will score some runs this y= ear, but an effective lead-off batter is critical for this team to win the NL Central.  Look for Coop and co= mpany to work harder with this 25-year old, reducing his strikeouts and fly balls.  Jastro would guess tha= t his one career homer was of the inside-the-park variety.

The Tough Decisions on the Brass March 5, 2008

Jastro has made his first = tough decision on the ‘Stros ownership/management for the 2008 MLB season:  The owner is a cool old white dude and came to Florida because he has trucking intere= sts (ha!).  Coop is a cool old bla= ck dude with practically impeccable baseball credentials from the front lines.  Ed Wade earns Jastro&#= 8217;s respect, instantly, by severing the umbilical with Burkypoo and Lane.  Go figure, the year of the ‘= Stros!

The Tough Decisions on the Mound March 5, 2008

Jastro has made his first = tough decision on the mound for the 2008 MLB season:  The starting rotation will include Roy O., Woody, Wandy, Backe and Chacon.  The bullpen will include Valverde, Borkowski, Brocail (while he lasts), Moehler, McLemore and Sampson.  Battling for the twelfth spot are = :  Cassel (minors), Villarreal (almost lock), Paulino (minors), Nieve (minors), Geary (over), Gervacio (shot), Jam= es (shot), Paronto (slim), Reinske and Wright (minors).  

The Tough Decisions in the Field March 5, 2008

Jastro has made his first = tough decision for the 2008 MLB season:  JastroWorld will rely on MLB.TV for video coverage of ‘Stros games for the year.  Even at 400K, the video quality is= quite impressive when streamed thru COMCAST high-speed internet.  At $119.95 for the season, it is $= 60 less than the MLB package offered by COMCAST and Jastro has considerably mo= re flexibility to enjoy the explosive ‘Stros action he anticipates this season.

 

Spring Training is a time = for optimism and the 2008 ‘Stros offer much to be optimistic about.  From owner Drayton McLane to the l= aundry dude, even though there are considerable personnel changes over last season= and some favorites have moved on, everyone looks forward to the potential explosiveness of this group of projected starters.  The tough decisions surround the a= ctual batting border rather than whom will start where.

 

The ‘Stros have 53 optimistic players in camp this year, 28 of them newcomers.  Unfortunately for most of these gu= ys, there is only one of thirteen position-players up for grabs this season; ei= ther a fifth outfielder (Abercrombie or Cruz) or Quintero as a third catcher.

 

Lee, Pence, Bourn and Erst= ad appear to be a lock in the outfield.  Berkman, Matsui, Tejada, Wigginton, Blum and Loretta appear to be lo= cks for the six infield positions.  Ausmus and Towles appear to be the catchers.  You do the math.  Jastro uses “appear” b= ecause trades, free-agent signings and other outside influences are possible.=

 

Jose Cruz, Jr. is a sentim= ental favorite, because of his Dad, but he will turn 34 in April and has bounced around the majors.  He has a c= areer .248 batting average and almost a whiff per hit (1161 hits, 1138 whiffs).  Reggie Abercrombie is a speedy you= ng outfielder that is out of options.  In 331 at-bats over two season’s with the Marlins, he hits an average of .208 and has 100 whiffs to 55 hits.  He will turn 27 this season.  Even though Quintero is out of opt= ions, Jastro questions the logic of keeping him on the 25-man roster at the expen= se of a fifth outfielder.